I wonder if she knows...

I wonder if she knows that I think of her, every night, when I stand over the bed of my children and tuck them in when they are asleep. I look at the curve of their face, and listen to their deep, deep, breath. I wonder if she stood above me just the same.

I wonder if she knows that during every sleepless night when the boys were just born, I thought of her. She had these same sleepless nights when I was little, and she made it through. Just the thought of that, made me make it through, too.

I wonder if she knows that I think of her every time the boys are sick. So sick that they are just burning up in your arms. I think of how she tells me that I used to get such high fevers, they were scary. Knowing that she held me at those times, makes my eyes well up with tears.

I wonder if she knows that during every day that I am at my wits end, I think of her. I know there were days we drove her absolutely CRAZY, and she made it through. Just knowing that, makes the days go so much faster.

I wonder if she knows that there are often times, when my little boys will look at me, and my heart grows ten sizes bigger, just to hold the love I have for them. Sometimes I just stare at them because I cannot believe they are my own sons. I know her heart grew the same.

I wonder if she knows just how much I appreciate every thing she did for me, and although I don't often say it, or show it, I think of her often, every day. I could not have realized what it was like to love a child, until I had my own. And what makes it just amazing to me, is that she has done it for my entire life.

I love you so much Mom. Happy Mother's Day.