Tuesday, May 31, 2011


This weekend was a family weekend.  By family I don't only mean the 4 people that live in this house, but our extended family.  Our in-laws, our friends, and the kids that we've watched grow up over the last 8 years we've lived in this house. 

Little Dylan graduated from High School.  And by little, I don't really mean little at all.  He's taller than me and has two jobs right now.  One of them is at the daycare center where we take our kids, and he's fantastic at it.  The kids just love him, and so do the parents.  He's always smiling, and will always give you a short "brief" on what the kids did that day.  He tells me about good days, bad days, and everything in between.

It was so nice being with friends and family that know me so well.  We can just talk and laugh and laugh some more.  The graduation party on Sunday ended up lasting over 12 hours because no one really wanted to go home.  It was fun, and there was enough food and drinks for an army, and the army that we had, ate and drank it all.  The Ney's have never ran out of food and drink at their house, ever.

I ended up taking over 350 pictures that day at the party, since Vicki put me in charge of being "Wang" (the term all of my friends know me as, affectionately given to me in honor of the movie 'Caddyshack'.)  Here are some of my favorites from the day that capture the moments, the fun, and just the reason that we have friends and family so close.

Two Peas.  One Pod.  =)

Dylan (right) and his friend, Tanner.  Connor thinks Tanner is one of the coolest guys, ever.

A nasty rainstorm went through Sunday morning and created puddles everywhere.  Never fear though, the kids know just what to do with them!  (Chase is here having fun!)

Guess who else found the puddle?  Connor had two showers that night to remove grass and mud from him, and went through at least 4 outfits.  He had a blast. 

Tyler's best adult friend, Bret.  Bret has a jet ski and Tyler thinks he is the coolest guy, ever.

Connor was about floored when he noticed there were other teachers from Frog Hollow (his daycare) at the party (since they are friends with Dylan).  He was so shy to talk to them, and it was so cute.  You could tell he was trying to put it all together in his head, like his worlds were colliding.  He finally warmed up enough to them, and hung around Alex, Nick and Kinsey for the rest of the evening.

Me and my sister-in-law, Kim.  I cannot tell you how much fun we had that night, but my stomach is still sore from laughing.

This is one of my favorites of me and Kyle from the night.  Maybe because he has cash in his hand...I'm not sure. 

The girls getting crazy.  Brenda, Sam and I having a laugh. 

I will do everyone else a favor and not post the remaining pictures, because as you can see from the counter, fun was had by all! 

Families are there for you all the time.  In good, in bad, and in fun.  I'm really glad this day could be one of the fun ones.  It makes life just that much more fun when you know you have lots of people that you can count on, and that are counting on you.  

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The e-mail that made my day

Last week was a crazy week.  It was work times two, packing boxes to move to my new job, and lots of stuff at home.  I was distracted, at best.

Friday afternoon I was walking back to my office and was checking my Blackberry to get caught up on e-mail.  I was thrilled when I received the following message from his kindergarten teacher:

"Just wanted you to know that Tyler has been doing much better this week. He wrote a story today that had a detailed picture with it, used spaces, great handwriting, and he used several sentences to tell the story. He was very proud of his work!!! Have a great weekend."

It was one of the best times of my life.  We're getting there.  He is a totally different kid, and I wish I could explain it so it would make sense to others, but you know what, it just means the world to me.

Sometimes, with all of the distractions in life and everything else frustrating or worrysome, there are small miracles that happen all the time.  Right in front of me. 

Monday, May 16, 2011


It is again this time of the year.  I'm not quite sure if it's my favorite, because I have a lot of favorites in the year.  One that does stick in my mind though is the fresh green grass (when it's so new and soft) and when the sun stays out longer in the evening.  I guess that would be now.

It was such a yucky weekend, so to see the sun finally poke it's head out on Sunday afternoon was wonderful.  We were able to sit outside some, enjoy some beverages with friends, and grill some food.  This picture just says "relaxing" to me.  

We are also fans of sharing things around our house.  One of the things we like to share is pinkeye.  Tyler was home last Tuesday with it, and Connor woke up with a nasty case of it on Sunday.  This is nothing compared to what his eye looked like in the morning.  Poor guy, and he HATES the eye drops we have to give him.  He will fight with every ounce of his strength to just not have those drops put in his eyes.  By the way, I think he is stronger than I am.  (Sorry for the gross picture, but you really get the point).

As he got up this morning, I didn't think I should send him to daycare looking how he did.  Although he had been on the drops for 24 hours (their rule) his eye was still pretty blood shot so he stayed home with me.  I had a day of vacation planned anyway, so it wasn't too bad.  I got some things done, and had a buddy with me who I spoiled all day long. 

Connor knows I'm a total pushover for him when we're alone, so as I stopped at Casey's to get gas, he asked for a donut.  I didn't mind at all, and let him pick out whatever he wanted.  He picked out powdered donuts and we ate them on the deck.  He shared one with me, because he said I was his friend. 

With school being done, I'm really enjoying getting back to life.  I have about 15 pounds to lose that I gained over the 20 months of the program, and a new job to begin pretty soon too that I think will have me really challenged for a while. 

Most of all, I'm enjoying getting back to my family.  I've missed truly enjoying them. 

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Finally Back

This is so nice... you have no idea.  I'm sitting on my couch in the evening, just messing around on the computer.  I actually did some work earlier, but am finally able to catch up on my heart and soul (my blog).  This is the place where I dump "it" (my heart and soul), so that is what it might as well be called.

There are so many things to catch us up on.  Too many to count.  So many things I'm worried about, stressed about, proud about, and everything in between, it's just confusing.  I don't even have enough to talk about all of them, so I'll talk about what's most important to me.  My kids...

I've talked many times about Tyler.  Finally, this spring in his school conference with his Kindergarten teacher, I just blurted it out... "Do you think Tyler could have......... issues?"... and then cringed for my answer. 

His teacher is awesome.  She just paused, and thought about her answer and said, "Yes, I think Tyler is definitely a child that could benefit from some testing to see how we could better work with him". 

That moment was life-changing.  I was relieved, and worried, all at the same time.  I knew Tyler was a different child from the moment he was born, and to finally hear someone in the "professional world" acknowledge that for me was incredible. 

I immediately made an appointment for Tyler at the recommendation of his teacher with a psychologist in town.  She's incredible, and Tyler really likes her a lot.  He will only refer to her as "Tricia", and I think she makes him feel really comfortable.  We visited her 4 times, once for Kyle & I to talk to her about what we've seen, and two times to have him tested, and then for our follow up appointment  We didn't get to see the tests, but only heard from Tyler that "they were hard". 

I went to the follow up appointment last week to discuss his test resuts, and Kyle was not able to go due to a work committment he could not get out of.  She talked to me for nearly a half an hour about the results of his tests, that showed he has attention and control issues that are worse that 90% of the kids his age.  It was like looking at an Iowa Test of Basic Skills (something I took as a child that they still administer to kids in school) in reverse.  All of his scores were worse than over 90% of "normal" kids.  She said he really struggled, a lot.  He struggled so much that she ended the last test early because he finally looked at her and said "I have no idea what you just said", when asked to repeat a simple sentence she read. 

I knew this.  None of this surprised me, really.  Or his teacher, or Kyle, or his grandparents, or our friends, or anyone on this earth.  Anyone that had met Tyler knew he was special.

It wasn't until after this that I got the shock.

I had people at work compare it to Down's Syndrome, and told me to not even tell the school because he would be labeled, and put in special classes.  I had people tell me "But it's not like the end of the world, is it?", when they heard.  I had people that told me about the special government programs that he would qualify for...

What what what?  Really?  Honest to God, he qualifies now as a child with a disability.  Seriously.  That about floored me.  I had always heard about ADHD, and what you had to do about it, and the medication might make him not hungry, etc., but I had NEVER heard that he would have to be put on a special government program to ensure he gets the right education, and that we would be in a meeting next week with his teacher, the guidance counselor, his principle and his teacher, all at the same time, to discuss how Tyler can have the "right" education.


No one wants anything else for their children than for them to be "normal".  And don't get me wrong, this is nothing as far as health issues go, but over the last week, I have learned that our life will be different with him for the next 12 years, and we will have to pick the right teacher, and ask that he sit in front of class, and he will be on medication, and we have to read special government websites and ensure there is a "plan" documented with the school so he gets the right education.  Nothing you would ever expect to have to do with your otherwise totally normal child.

Okay, so maybe I'm making this out to be more than it is, and I've probably talked to more people about it than I should, but I was really confused at first, and now I'm just trying to figure this out. 

So, here we start on this journey, and it worries me.  I worry about that poor guy, because I've seen him struggle, and seen his pain, and seen his HUGE tears.  He really wants what is right, but just can't connect the dots to get there, so that's what we're going to help him to try do.  Pray for us through this journey, because I don't think it will be too hard for him, but it will be extremely hard for me.  He's my boy.  My oldest boy.  The baby I knew first, and I know him like he's a part of my soul.  I've cried more in the last week than I have about much lately, because I want nothing less for Tyler than to be able to achieve the wishes and dreams that everyone has.  And we'll get him there...