Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Do you believe in ghosts?

The other night I was in our bedroom putting away some laundry. As I was standing at the foot of the bed, I saw something out of the corner of my eye, flash by in the hall. "Tyler...", I thought, and went to see what he was doing in his bedroom. He wasn't in there - but was still sitting quietly in the living room watching one of his shows. But, I could've sworn something just went by. Oh well - probably just something in my eye, or it was in my head, so I didn't think anything else of it, but it did get me thinking.

I guess you could say I've always been a believer in ghosts. And maybe not so much "ghosts", but "spirits". I firmly believe there are good and bad spirits, and sometimes we can see those spirits, or see what they do. Please don't think I'm some sort of "Ghosthunter" freak or anything, but certain things have happened that really make me believe.

I vividly remember one day a few years ago (2001-ish). I was shopping at our local mall during my lunch hour, and was browsing through a store that I typically didn't shop in. While I was shopping I got that strange feeling....you know? Like someone is watching you, or looking at you. I turned around and looked outside the store, and sitting there on the bench was my grandma. She was sitting there holding her purse, just looking around, as if she were just waiting for someone. My mind started racing as I turned away. "I couldn't have seen what I just did...", I think to myself, "What is going on...", so I turned back around quickly, and she was gone.

I'm pretty sure I'm not crazy. Well - at least most of the time, but since this happened before I had kids, I was getting regular nights of good rest and was fairly healthy. My grandma had passed away in June of 2000, and during the last years of her life, I saw her more often than I did while I was growing up. My dad made a point to go see his mom at least once a month, if not more often, in order to to just visit, but I think he knew to take every last opportunity he had to spend with her. I sometimes went with him, just spending the day with her, chatting about local gossip, and what new restaurant had opened in town.

What does this all mean, and why am I yammering on about this today? I think about this incident often, and think it was a fluke that I saw her that day, but believe that people that we have touched in our lives, continue to visit us even after they're gone. I believe it is their "guiding spirits" that help us through bad times, keep us going through it all, and even slightly offering advice when we need it but are too stubborn to ask out loud.

In the meantime, any flashes of light in the hallway I usually chalk up to pure exhaustion, but I do keep my eyes peeled now when I go to the mall. I still have the jacket I bought that day that I saw her, and think about her whenever I put it on. Maybe that's all she wanted. Me to have something specific to constantly remind me what is important in life.

When I think of her, I think of family.

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